Oh, HELL Noah.

HEY, EVERYONE. SORRY THERE WASN’T AN UPDATE YESTERDAY. YOU SEE, ZACHARY TOOK ME OUT INTO NATURE SOMEWHERE AND LEFT ME HERE TO DIE FROM FRESH AIR, ALLERGIES, AND EXTREME BOREDOM. HE’S PROBABLY NEVER COMING BACK, EITHER. I’M ON MY OWN NOW. ALL ALONE IN THE WORLD. SOON, I’LL BE IN ONE OF THOSE COMMERCIALS WITH SARAH MCLACHLAN SINGING IN THE BACKGROUND. IN THE AAAAARMS OF THE AAAANGEL, FAR AWAAAAAAAAY FROM HEEEEERE.

noah, i’m right here. i’m taking the photo.

WHO IS THAT? IS IT THE VOICE OF GOD? ARE YOU SPEAKING TO ME FROM THE MOUNTAIN? ARE YOU SAYING THAT I SHOULD POOP ALL OVER THE BACKSEAT OF ZACH’S CAR WHEN HE FINALLY COMES BACK TO FIND ME? WELL, IT’S A REALLY NICE CAR, BUT IF YOU INSIST.